Abbey is a nice name for a girl.
I am going on a retreat to the Benedictine Abbey in Jamberoo tomorrow. Yay. yay. Yay. It’s all a bit unknown to me. But I’m pretty excited about the idea of retreat, sleeping, walking, praying, reflecting and just generally not having responsibility for a few days.

L’Arche is great for learning not to care what people think of you. Another moment of Andrew not wanting to get out of his wheelchair. A great idea hit Nina and I. Andrew responds well to music where people dance like idiots. So, there it was, in the middle of Parramatta I cranked the music in the car and Nina and I made quite sufficient fools of ourselves dancing dancing dancing. I closed my eyes and thought, I’m in a lounge room and gee I think it worked.

I would really like snippets of sound recordings from this house sometimes. It’s like an absurd surreal place. Martin says during dinner. I am laughing because I am Popeye. Of course he is Popeye.
Everything happens at 4 o’clock. Of course it does.
Do you want something? Yes. What do you want? Nothing.
What do you want to eat for dinner? Jemma. Hmmm. With what? Toast.
Do you want to go and see this movie. It’s about these people who accidentally get married in Las Vegas. Pause. Gabriel puts it well. Rubbish. Well we didn’t see that.

Oh life life here is thrills and spills it makes me laugh laugh laugh.

It’s been the education week in our house of Farnsy and Barnsy. I realised I didn’t know the difference. I’m pretty up on Farnsy but not too much on Barnsy. Last night Gab and I were walking through Westfields at Parramatta and who should be there?

JIMMY BARNES.
I was so excited I was almost wetting my pants.

“and education can be fickle i think,
sometimes the more you learn,
the more you lose a sense of what you think you know
about all the buttons still left to sew”

- Josh Pyke

I think the overwhelming feeling of late is that I am an alien. Most unfortunate really. I think I’ve always seen myself as an observer of life rather than a participant and it’s sort becoming a reality to participate now. And it’s making me feel kind of alien or something. Been trying to convince myself that I’m really not that odd. Making slow progress I suppose. I’ve also been going down the just don’t care path about being alien. That’s not working so well because the fact is I just do care so darn much about ‘fitting in’. Why why why.

Tuesday night. We are having ‘piles and chunda’ for dinner. We’ve been naming foods in our house, started off with Claire’s ‘morrocan fantasy’ and followed with my ‘thai shock’ (hand movements involved in the naming of this one).

Anyhow, all this food naming reminded me of some of the winners we had as kids. ‘Piles’ was the standard dish. And last night I was reminded of ‘Chunda’ which was a dessert. And seeing as Tuesday is dessert night, ‘Piles’ and ‘Chunda’ it is!

Grown men wearing bimbo shirts. I never did get the photo in Mexico that I wanted, but today it’s front page news.

This is now over a week overdue. The exciting news in my life the past week was that Micha and I started going out. I think most people know this now, and most people have been able to give me the appropriate teasing so it all feels official like.

I think this post should make Claire happy. She not only gets a mention but I’m sure will find a way to bring it up in an embarrassing moment in an attempt to make me blush. But I won’t. Oh no I won’t.

I have been filled with this overwhelming sense of the need to listen to other people’s wisdom. I don’t really know how one does that. But I feel wretched like I so often underestimate people. I hate that. Today I am trying to live with the new found respect I have for people. Without being overwhelmed with my own failings. Leunig talks about roses giving the gift of self-acceptance. Maybe I should ponder some.