Jo told me the other day she’d been praying that the mail would arrive. And well, it sort of worked, because the next day Gabbie got 2 massive packages. I told Emily this, and she thought maybe we needed to be more direct with the prayers. So right there and then she sent a prayer that I would get my mail. And, it seemed to work a treat…because…the next day, I Got Mail.

 And I danced a jig of Joy.

The house is finally full with its full membership. Xuxa returned today from Germany. Meeting someone you haven’t yet met can cause slight anxiousness, that I hope we get on considering we live together. But I like her very very much. She is just a sweety. So this has cheered me a lot. And I’m having 2 good language days in a row which also cheers me. So things are looking up.

I’ve just decided I want them to, and its started to work.

 Other positive news is that 2 packages from Australia appeared in our fruit box today. Not for me, for Gabbie, but from Australia. Once I got over carrying on about how jealous I was, I was excited. This means the postal system works. And our how has some mysteries at the moment. Like el misterio del globo. Gabbie’s balloon just disappeared. And the packages arrived through the window by no one in the house. Hmmmm, que misterio.

The church hunt continued this morning. New churches are so overwhelming, particularly when they speak another language. Although, Mexicans do do welcoming well. Pretty much when we walked in the whole church came and kisses us.

This was well…an experience. It was a rather pentecostal church which was rather full on. Although easy to understand. I did like that. And the best part was they had lots of dancers in costumes and a time when people ran around with flags and did conga lines. It was kind of like small scale Blackstump in Spanish. For some reason it’s so much more full on in another language. I think not going along with things feel more culturally inappropriate…like clapping and yelling, so you feel uncomfortable whatever you do.

I think a place where I belong has not yet been found.

Friday night took us to the theatre in this funky little joint. We sat up the top and looked down at the stage where everyone else sat around at tables. I understood enough to get the jist of the play, although I think it was mildy absurdist which didn’t really help. Rather raunchy though. But funny. It was fun to see a room of people laughing so much. I also saw a boy who wore a tea cosy on his head. This made me happy and made me definitely decide I need to meet some hippies.

Afterward, I went and cooked the panqueques that I had prepared before. Xanath, Eli, Luis, Gab, Cara and I sat around the table and ate pancakes and chatted. I felt sad, funny, cause you’d think pancakes would make me happy. But good news is, I think they went down a treat. Although everyone decided they were yummiest with nutella and bananas. The thought of this on pancakes make my belly want to hurl. Ja.

One of the funniest things so far about this country (Cara keeps picking me up on saying this phrase) is the specialty horns that I discovered the other day. I was walking down the street and heard a horn that sounded like a wolf whistle. I suppose if you really want to do it that often it’s far more efficient to just get a horn.

We went on a little expedition to the countryside round Xalapa to a town called Lencero. So peaceful and quiet. I could very much live in a place like that.

We expeditioned there to go to a big ol grand house/hacienda where Hernan Cortés used to live, and more recently the wife of Pablo Neruda. It was mega grand and they had a whole floor just for guests. I thought it would make a good community house/farm. I think it would be quite expensive though. Bummer. Anyway, it was pretty spiff. And they had ducks and a mega pond and cool old horse carriage carts for community outings.

The history in this country is kind of amazing.

The list continues.

- using the avocado seed to stop the salsa from going brown.

The redeeming factor of yesterday was that we watched Amelie in the night time, and I watched it with Spanish subtitles and almost understood all. I think perhaps because I’ve seen the movie so many times. Ja. Although that movie still doesn’t fail to cheer. We even had esquites, which, are my new favourite thing and they didn’t manage to cheer like Amelie.

Anyway, I think there is just a point when you hit a wall and everything falls apart. I was so tired I was falling over and dropping things. Was missing home. Was wanting to have and identity in this land. Was wanting to have friends. Wanting to be able to communicate. Wanting not to be tired. Wanting to understand. Wanting to feel loved. Oh yes, it was all falling apart. But I suppose a bit of loneliness is to be expected. I figure I wouldn’t be here if I wasn’t meant to be. I feel very sure of that much…That’s good news eh.

Cara and I caught a bus this morning back to town from yoga. It was meant to go to centro but it seemed that 2 stops down the road he didn’t want us on his bus anymore. He tells us to get off, but we weren’t really near centro. But it didn’t make any sense because he let other people stay on.

Oh life can be a funny thing.

I think it’s amazing how one can be very intelligent and competent. I would think I’m quite smart and competent, but it’s amazing how incompetent not speaking a language can make you feel. It’s all the small things, like wanting to play on a swing, but you have no idea what its called. I feel like I’m about 4 years old in my level of communication, although, when I talk to 4 year olds I find they are more fluent.

This is so incredibly frustrating and kind of preocupies the majority of my headspace. mmm esquite craving. There are so up and down days…but today is a hard one, like I want to rip my hair out.