I’d be interested to know the statistics between Musicians and Marriage. They always seem to be singing about some new girl or guy. Even old folks like Van the Man. I reckon it’s a cover they put on, if we knew how together they were their music wouldn’t sell. People would be bored hearing about the same ol Jennifer every week and not how much they hate her now, or how much they can’t live without her.
It amazes me people never bored with a good old love song. When you aren’t in love with anyone, I reckon they are the most boring songs. Unless they are real good. Or have been able to really relate to them at some point. I usually will go for the songs that are relevant in the here and now.

I have a habit of finding big painful bruises all over my legs and having no recollection of how I got it. I don’t understand that, you’d think something that becomes big and painful would be something you’d remember. And then when I remember painful moments and think “Gee, that’ll be a ripper bruise,” there is no bruise.

I did twenty laps of the pool yesterday. I’ve never done that before in my life. Yep. I think that learning (well not really learning but going over) Shakespeare and other monologues is really helpful. It wasn’t even that hard. I could have kept going. Although I kept wanting powernaps for the rest of the day and being really slow at work. But thats okay.
Sadly, I didn’y get to go to my new church because I had to work. I’m meant to work next Sunday night too. But I am hoping I can get out of it. I really do.

God help us to find our confession;
The truth within us which is hidden from our mind;
The beauty or the ugliness we see elsewhere
But never in ourselves…

- Leunig

This is something I’ve been thinking about a lot ever since we went to see Sons of Korah. I reckon it’s so so so hard to actually do that. The amount of times I tell myself I can do that but actually don’t is amazing. It’s actually a pretty difficult task. I think its interesting how much the actual act of confession is significant compared to just acceptign that we do things wrong each day and that we wish we wouldn’t. Thinking specifically of all the little things is a hard task, but I reckon its good, because although big ones are good to acknowledge they are easier to find, and we don’t do really “big” things all the time, well sometimes. But my life is filled with lots of little things that I wish I wouldn’t do, which are not really any better than “big” things, but are easier to overlook.

I think Sons of Korah introduced a song saying that we actually have to acknowledge our sins each time to be forgiven. And that so often God trys to call to us, but we harden our hearts. I can’t remember what song it was, or if it was two, but I think it was,

Then I acknowledged my sin to you
And I didn’t cover my Iniquity
I said, “I’ll confess my sins to You.”
And you forgave me the guilt of my sin…
You are my hiding place;
You protect me
And you surround me
With redemption songs.”

- Psalm 32 5 and 7

As I lay dozing this morning, much cuffufle seemed to revolve around a chicken. There was a knock on the door. Murray from over the road comes to tell us that he thinks the chicken has been hurt an its up on his driveway and he needs to go.

Mum goes and fetches chicken. Brings chicken back here. Chicken has sore leg and mum sets up a sick bed for the chicken.

About ten minutes later, Tom from next door comes round and says, “Could I get my chicken?”
Apparantly our explorer, road savvy chicken is still out and about dodging cars, and poor non-explorer, road savvy chicken from next door, didn’t manage to make it to the other side of the road.

I don’t reckon that would happen to very many chickens, to be mixed up with the one next door.

Attention passengers on platform 1, your next North Shore service will depart from platform number 1.

I think considering we’d been waiting there for it for 25 mins we’d gathered that.

Normally, doing all the things I have to do this weekend would stress me out. But I’m really not. I am quite un stressed and actually really looking forward to this wedding. I hope lots of people from my class last year are there. That wuld bring me much joy. I loved my class. Everything has fallen into place and if more people could get married it would be good because I do like buying wedding presents (when it involves cool red dishes from kmart)

I bought the coolest red dish in k-mart today. It’s too cool for words. And it was only $9.99. It’s part of Bella’s wedding present. It’s just too cool. I can’t comprehend…too cool. Too cool. It’d square, red and you could make lasagne ripper in it, and did I say its cool?

I was reading Leunig before I went to bed last night, and I always have this way of opening up prayers or the bible and it articulating something I’ve been thinking about but not being able to put it into words.

Dear God, we pray for another way of being: another way of knowing.

Across the difficult terrain of our existence we have attempted to build a highway and in doing so have lost our footpath. God lead us to our footpath: Lead us where in simplicity we may move at the speed of natural creatures and feel the earth’s love beneath our feet. Lead us there where step by step we may feel the movement of creation in our hearts. And lead us there where side by side we may feel the embrace of the common soul. Nothing can be loved at speed. God lead us to the slow path; to the joyous insights of the pilgrim; another way of knowing; another way of being.
Amen

- Leunig

My favourite bit it nothing can be loved at speed I think that’s what I’ve been thinking about, that I am happiest when things are slowly changing or being. I don’t like things going real fast it makes me feel out of place. So I suppose my main prayer is that I am content with the slow path and can find the goodness in the joyous insights of the pilgrim Yep.

Again in my wonderings I flipped the page and found a beautifully simple prayer.

God help us to live slowly:
To move simply:
To look softly:
To allow emptiness:
To let the heart create for us.
Amen

- Leunig

I’m not so good at creating emptiness, but it sure is a nice idea. Slow, soft simplicity is I think where I find the most meaning. And the only way I know.

Baby slow down
The end is not as fun as the start
Please stay a child somewhere in your heart
- U2

I feel tired. I feel like I can’t be bothered to make the effort to talk. I feel like sleeping.
I find I feel yuck and useless and real boring when I spend days procrastinating. I hate it. I have spent this week not trying to do things so I can practice my monologues. But I find myself sitting at home procrastinating all day, not letting myself get into anything fun at home becasue that would be too obviously procrastinating. The thing is, I don’t mind being at home with not much to do, because I can make something fun or useful up, but being at home intending to do something but not is the most depressing thing in the world. And I find myself feeling like the most boring person in the world after days like that. Like now.
But bed would be real useful and productive cause I don’t remember having an awful lot last night.