I could perhaps not find my childhood so cute, but I do, so hmmm I don’t know what words of wisdom should be said about that.

Hmm. Friday night was way fun. It was just what I needed to be cheered up. It made me forget I was meant to be feeling sad and lonely. Which was way nice. I love my friends. They are the best way to cheer me up. I think I was able to be happy to because I had decided to embrace my sadness and boredom and fear of loneliness that day by going out, even though I wasn’t alone. But then the whole weekend followed and im just generally feeling happier about myself. Subject to change though. And after church we totally watched Audrey and she is just so fun. I would love to be like her. She makes me chuckle so much. And she likes to eat which is way tops.
And so, today of course, I sewed. And I would like Howie to note I did a Very Good Job.
And so tomorrow I shall do the same.
And, and, and I’m wetting my pants about this road trip.

I’m going out with uni people tonight and they make me feel nervous. Maybe I’m scared of them. I hate that anxious feeling in your stomach before you go out. Its hard to have a good time, but usually it gets better.

Because I was looking for group accommodation in Adelaide/SA for this road trip idea and you can rent out wildernessy places for so cheap and so fun and its too exciting and Tom hasn’t responded to my email to tell me how exciting it is and so now I’m wetting myself because I want to go now. OOOooooow. And ones like an old school house and it would be totally fun and it fits 20 people but if only like five decide to come it still totally cheap. If 16 people went it would be something like $16 for the weeks accommodation!

I finally embraced my boredom and loneliness and went and did something with my day. It wasn’t lonely though because I took Chris. But it was fun. We went to the Sydney film festival and saw Seducing Dr Lewis which was way cool. It was cool too because it was at the State Theatre and I imagined myself going there for a film premiere and everyone being dressed up and walked around this grand ol place. It was good to get out and do something, and even better I’ve said for many a year I want to go to the Sydney Film Festival and never did. I thought it was just movies on, but its actually special. SO my uni lecturers will be proud of me seeing foreign films at film festivals. It did also make me want to go to Quebec. So if Mexico doesn’t work out maybe I’ll change my options. Then I can learn French. In fact I actually understood a fair bit of the film considering I haven’t spoken French since year 8 or so, and couldn’t actually speak then. I would like to hermit myself oneday and watch so many French films until I can speak French. How cool would that be.
Then even better I went and ate yumminess at the GPO. Ooooooooooooo yumness. But then I felt really sick which was ashame. I hope I don’t have to live off liquids again. I could cope with the mash, that sounded pretty good. But I hope I aint getting sick, because when you feel sick, for some reason, you feel yucky??Ahh
I’m going to learn how to make Roman Blinds. Maybe that can be my holiday job.

What could be better in the morning than having John Mayer so loud he makes your insides vibrate.
I don’t know that I want to hear from anyone if they have anything better. It’s just my personal favourite!

That perhaps I’m allergic to onion? It always seems to give me a headache, only whilst cooking though.
Hmmm, try not to think about it too long, that kind of thing can mess with your head.

I wish that I knew the answers

“I can’t live, With or Without you” - U2

I have this thing, and I wish I didn’t. But I put these limitations on myself to meet the expectations that other people have of me. I thinks it interferes with who I am. I wish I wouldn’t.

I reckon blogs make me feel like I need to put on a happy face. Partly because I don’t want to sound repetitive and I don’t feel satisfied with how I express what I’m feeling. But often I don’t actually want to say what i’m feeling, or why I’m feeling that. But again, I would never write in a paper journal. Never have and probably never will.